Belligerence is contagious

Thursday, November 29, 2018
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Conservative views

I went for a run Saturday morning and a half-mile from home I noticed a pickup and trailer creeping my direction. The rig stopped, the driver got out and began walking towards me. He was a friend who currently claims the title of owning the craziest cow to ever visit my vet clinic. Looking at the empty trailer I jokingly blurted, “Let me guess, you are hunting a wild cow?”

Bruce sheepishly answered, “Well, actually we are.”

Apparently, a neighbor was chasing a cow with control issues and requested Bruce’s assistance knowing he owned a dart gun. Bruce had misplaced his drugs so tracked me down to borrow a dose of Rompun. Attention new veterinarians: NEVER BUY A DART GUN! When a midnight caller asks if you own one you can say “No, call Bruce,” and then go back to sleep. A yes response will suck two hours out of your busy life and it is far more convenient and profitable to have Bruce buy one and then sell him the drugs.

Unbeknownst to many producers, the cattle industry is suffering an epidemic of mad cow disease – not the reportable type caused by an infectious prion, but one caused by ranchers tolerating bad attitudes. If you run an isolated ranch and rarely work your neighbor’s cattle, you may think all cows are as wild as yours. Such is not the case. There are herds where a trophy wife can step into a 12x12 maternity pen to help a chilled calf find the teat. There are others where you wouldn’t send your ex-wife in with anything less than an armored Humvee. Which is yours? Crazy cows not only raise crazy calves, but their high-headed demeanor infects the entire herd, which brings me to my point.

Belligerence is just as contagious in humans as it is in cows and America is suffering from infectious hostility. Like a few crazy cows stirring up the entire calving pen, Hillary Clinton, Maxine Waters, Eric Holder and Hollywood and media elitists are encouraging the little people to publicly badger conservatives. Leftists justify their attacks by labeling everyone with whom they disagree as racist, misogynists, homophobic fascists. Recently, while attending a family dinner in Charlottesville, Virginia, a loyal leftist assaulted Tucker Carlson’s 19-year-old daughter with a profanity laced diatribe. The Nazis used a similar demeaning technique to convince German citizens the Jews, Poles, and gypsies were sub-human and deserved extermination. Is history about to repeat itself?

Krayton Kerns is veterinarian in Laurel, Mont., and a former Republican representative in the Montana State Legislature. He can be reached at